'Get this to me as ASAP as possible': 20+ unwise comments from horrible bosses

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    Output device - "What happened to all of the emails in my recently deleted folder?? I keep a lot of important emails in there."
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    Font - Dumbest thing your boss has said? What is the most ridiculously dumb thing your boss has said, either current or past? Mine is that my boss who was paying me $7-8 an hour to do data entry said "Even the poorest of the poor can afford to save $1000 a month towards their future". What???? 1.5k Comments
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    Font - + [deleted] "You're hired" ↑ 630 Share
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    Font - ADIDAS247. Calls 12 people into his office and says, "5 of you need to be laid-off. I thought it would be best if you decided amongst yourselves." It ended up with 12 people telling him he was the most irresponsible, useless person to walk the Earth. He quit a week later because they were going to fire him for pulling that 331 Share
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    Font - eandi I have a collection: • "These cell culture kits are too expensive, can't you just culture a desk? A desk's a cell, right?"
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    Font - ● (In the middle of a meeting with about 10 people) "Hey, eandi, that zit on your nose is huge, you should pop it. If you don't...(proceeds to talk zits for another 2 minutes)"
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    Font - • "We are implementing a zero tolerance policy! The first time, we will give a warning. The second time, another warning. The third time they will get a written note... (It was a 6- step zero tolerance policy)"
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    Font - . "We need more women interested in Engineering! We should use polymers, they make diapers right? And can we use more pink? What about ovens?" (From a female boss) I will post more when I think of them, hilarious 2 years there. 215 Share
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    Font - [deleted] Boss: So, your store should be making more money. Why do you think you aren't? Some other Employee: The quality of our product has been pretty because you guys keep it at the warehouse too long. Boss: No, it's your customer service. You guys need to really give better customer service. Another Employee: Well, it's hard to be happy about product that because you guys buy too much product and then hold on to them for so long that they go bad. Boss: I don't see how this is relevant
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    Font - danzatrice. When I accepted a new better job, my boss was angry with me because I "didn't ask his permission" before accepting the new job. 174 Share
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    Font - CADragon We're at an engineering office, sending lots of large drawing files. So, a couple years ago: "Explain to me why our e-mails take so long to send. And I don't want you to blame it on our dial-up internet." So I just stared at him. ↑ 164 ↓ Share
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    BlueHealer89 "Hey, can you work on the queue instead of shipping today?" "Sure" /works on queue for hours <bvoice> "Hey, Bluehealer89, why is it that you haven't shipped anything today?!" </boice> This is a daily occurrence. 110 Share
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    Font - [deleted] I was building a website for one of our satellite campuses in Yuma, AZ. Some of the pages are also in Spanish since it's very common in that area. Upon the site being released, my boss runs into my cubicle shouting "You forgot to remove that stupid text!" 'What text?' I asked. "The Lorem Ipsum stuff you use for testing fonts! Get rid of it quick!" he then showed me the page. 'That's Spanish.' I replied. He walked off silently. ↑ 105 ↓ Share
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    Font - silent_hallucination. At a previous job, the office was on the third story and there was an earthquake. While everyone else proceeded to calmly move away from large objects that could fall around the office he shouted out, "Everyone! Stop, drop and roll!" He was serious.
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    Font - [deleted] I was making small talk and asked him what his favorite books were. He listed all of Glenn Beck's
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    Font - ✪ [deleted] "We're not hiring any more female programmers. Or anyone over [the age of] 50."
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    Font - imwhatshesaid She tried to convince me her smoking while pregnant was perfectly fine for her baby.
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    Font - + [deleted] "You read too many books." ↑ 80 ↓ Share
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    Font - ✪ [deleted] "Stop using Google Analytics, it's causing our internet to go down." heard today.
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    Font - [deleted] • Uses "hence" too much • Prefaces 85% of statements with "In my mind," meaning she has no real proof or substance to back up what she's about to say • Pronounces "especially" as "eckspecially"
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    Font - rlindsey. "You're seen as a mentor around here. People look up to you. So I need you to give more of an impression of being happy all the time. We're trying to keep morale up." Ridiculous because management is doing nothing to fix the key problems the staff has but rather asked me to be an ambassador of positive feelings.
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    Font - chriswastaken Context: I'm a Network Engineer/Administrator Me - I've found another position, this is my two weeks notice, I'll be happy to train another engineer the basics of the network I've created over the last year. Him - Actually, I'm going to need you to just revert it to the network we had before you started. Me - ಠ_ಠ
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    Font - MightyBrouhaha . B: Can you make a flow chart explaining how to install that? M: Its a linear process... B: Just do it.
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    Font - disphagia. What happened to all of the emails in my recently deleted folder?? I keep a lot of important emails in there.
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    Font - chrisbucks Synergy. ↑ 48 ↓ Share
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    Font - notjackbauer. "Get this to me as ASAP as possible." 42 ♡ Share

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